Scarsdale, New York: Saturday 11th November 2017
Sue finally stopped looking up at the sky, having finished whatever profound thinking the evening’s turmoil and her conversation with Francis had provoked. I saw her turn and wrap her arms tight around herself as protection against the sub-zero November temperatures.
As I heard the front door open and then close, I felt a sense of dread and fear as I awaited the coming conversation. The booze, panic, and sleepiness of my brain combined to befuddle my memory of Sue’s words to me when the dam of my emotions had finally broken. When I’d asked her if she loved Francis, and whether she wanted me any more, and if I’d lost her to Francis, I remembered she’d told me ‘no’. But ‘no’ to which of my questions? Was she telling me that ‘no’ she didn’t need me anymore? Or ‘no’ she didn’t love Francis or ‘no’ I’d not lost her to Francis. I remembered another sliver of the conversation when she’d told me she loved me. But then she went on to say that both of them were sorry for hurting me. What did that mean? Were they talking about hurt in the past, or hurt in the future? Apologizing early for the pain they were about to cause me? Was that what they’d been talking about in the drive? After all, why had they gone outside in the sub-zero temperatures to talk? Unless it was to share things they didn’t want me to hear. Round and round these questions went in my head as I heard Sue’s soft and barely audible barefoot steps on the stairs. So different to the loud sound of the five-inch heels that had clattered down the stairs as she’d headed out on her date with Francis. Finally, her beautiful face appeared in our bedroom. Love and concern etched on every inch. In a quiet and hurt voice, Sue started the conversation. “How could you ever think I don’t love you anymore and wanted to leave you for Francis?” Seeing the look on Sue’s face and hearing her voice, I suddenly felt silly and ridiculous for ever having entertained such thoughts. The human voice is a veritable rainbow when it comes to communicating feelings. In those few words, Sue’s tone managed to communicate love, hurt and more than a little exasperation. And probably a few other things which I was too male and too obtuse to spot. Sue came over and sat next to me on the edge of the bed. “Sweetheart, I know this can be hard and bit confusing for you. But please, never doubt my love for you. One night with Francis doesn’t change the last twenty years … it doesn’t change the wonderful week we had together … don’t you see that?” If I’d felt sexually and physically inadequate earlier, now I was adding a new string to my bow as I now felt emotionally inadequate. As Sue gently and lovingly asked me why I couldn’t see what was to her as obvious as the nose on my face. Trying to calm myself, I grasped her hands and looked into her soulful green eyes. “Sue, I’m sorry.” I knew my fears had hurt her, and I needed to own that and apologize. But I also needed to explain my side of the fence. “But, Sue baby, do you remember how you felt the first time you watched Grace and me making love. Baby, I am sorry. Truly sorry. But please see it from my side as well. Remember how you felt that night with Grace.” I saw an instant change in Sue’s demeanor. I could sense it in her body and see it in her face, as she transported herself back to her own painful memories from that night. “What are we going to do, Pete? I never want to do anything to hurt you baby, but tonight was no fun for me or Francis either?” Sue saw the confused look on my face. Gently grasping my hands in hers, she tried to explain. “Pete, love, you gave me permission to date whoever I wanted to. And I asked your approval for spending the night with Francis. And then you pulled the plug on us being able to spend the night together. And then you end up spoiling the end of our date when I’ve come home like you asked.” Sue said this with a gentle tone and a loving expression, but I sensed she was telling me something of great significance. It’s just she was doing it in a very gentle, loving and diplomatic way. My gut told me the ball of yarn she’d just unraveled an inch was linked to when she’d clammed up and not shared her thoughts when I’d asked her not to sleepover. It also told me it was linked to the conversation she and Francis had just had on our driveway. Safely out of my earshot. I looked at Sue, two best friends and partners for life looking deep into each other’s hearts, and tried to decide the best way of asking my next questions. I knew that if asked wrongly they had the potential for a major fight between us. With great love and gentleness, Sue had just fired a warning shot across my bows. Reminding me that I’d agreed to everything I was now uncomfortable with. It suddenly occurred to me that Sue and I had been together for twenty-years this very month. We’d met at an NYU party way back in November 1992. And I realized this was the first time she was talking about what another man might like or not like in the same breath as she talked about what I liked or she liked. For nearly twenty-five years it had been Sue and me against the world. But now another man was nudging his way into the picture. He wasn’t displacing me. I wasn’t so paranoid as to believe that. But he was definitely nudging into the picture. I’d been planning on choosing my words carefully. To be as loving and gentle as Sue had been in her choice of words. But suddenly I felt my temper flaring up, and all subtlety and thought went out of the window. “Sue, are you putting me at the same level as Francis? Coz that’s what it feels like.” I could see that she was shocked and hurt by the tone of my voice. Before I’d given her a chance to answer the accusation, I machine-gunned her with the other two questions looming large in my brain. “And while we’re at it, what were you two spending so long talking about out there in the freezing cold? And what was it Friday night that you were going to tell me and then chickened out of telling me?” No sooner than the words were out of my mouth than I regretted every last syllable. Pure paranoia, laced with booze and with a side of jealous terror for good measure. Before Sue had even thought about responding, I’d dropped my head in shame, now contemplating the carpet. Someone up there was smiling down on me that night. Sue told me later that it was fifty-fifty that she would explode and give me both barrels. But either luck or divine intervention allowed Sue to see the remorse in my head hanging low in shame. My perceptive wife had the wit and love to see that I was acting like a wounded animal lashing out in pain. I didn’t deserve it, but I felt her arms come round and cradle my head. Sue treated me like the wounded creature I was. She helped me strip off and then tucked me into the warm, comforting cotton of our marital bed. Having stripped herself, she then slipped beneath the same crisp white sheets and we just lay next to each other on our sides. Heads inches apart. Content just to gaze at each other, silent and just lost in our own thoughts. It was Sue who spoke first. “Do you know how much I love you, Peter Jones? And do you trust me?” Her words were crisp and simple. Cutting right to the heart of the matter. I didn’t answer immediately. It wasn’t that sort of conversation. I knew Sue wanted me to look deep into my heart and soul before answering her two simple questions. In a court, they say they want ‘the truth, the whole truth’ – and that’s what I knew I needed to uncover for myself and share with Sue. Because the truth can be like one of those Russian dolls. You can peel a first layer, but that doesn’t mean you’ve got anywhere near to the heart of the matter. Sue sensed my deep thinking and didn’t take offense at how long I was taking to answer her simple questions. Finally, I gave her a weak smile, the best I could manage, and started opening the Russian doll that was my fears and perceptions of reality. “Sue, I do know that you love me with all your heart … but’s it just that sometimes I panic and forget.” Sue was looking at me with a loving but firm expression, waiting for my second answer before speaking herself. “And yes, darling, I trust you totally … but sometimes I see the way you are with Francis … the closeness and connection between the two of you … and I worry about what might happen. Honey, it’s not that I don’t trust you … it’s just that I see the evidence of my own eyes … and I remember two things you once said to me. ‘There are no cast-iron guarantees in this world’ and ‘the world is full of couple’s who promised each other they’d never leave each other.’” I could tell Sue was chewing on my words and trying to decide what to say next. They say that genius is simplicity. Cutting through all the complexity to get to the core of things. E=mc2 or “I think, therefore I am’. I’m truly lucky that I married a woman with this type of intelligence. “Pete, honey. Once and for all, you’ve got to make up your mind. Either you’re okay for me to be in a relationship with Francis, or you’re not.” Her hand reached across to gently stroke my hair, and she continued. “I’ll support you in whatever you choose, darling. I’ll be honest with you and tell you that yes, for myself I’d like to carry-on seeing Francis. But, more important, I won’t do anything that’s going to hurt or jeopardize our marriage. So if it’s too much for you, or you’ve changed your mind, then I’ll be happy to go back to how things were before.” Sue leaned forward the last few inches between us and gave me a smile to melt my heart, kissing me more softly and tenderly than I can ever remember. “Pete, honey, you don’t need to decide now. Take your time. And know that I’ll always love you and support you whatever you decide. But, honey, this time let’s decide for keeps. It’s not fair to anyone if we keep changing our minds.” I smiled at my amazing wife, knowing she was being diplomatic again. What she meant was it wasn’t fair to her and Francis if I kept changing my mind. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was just after five a.m. on Saturday morning when Sue had posed her final question and told me to take my time deciding. We were both wiped out by all the highs and lows of the night and so we slept like babes, waking just before lunch on Saturday. We awoke naked and spooned together, and happily, nature took it’s course as I felt the soft curves of Sue’s naked behind next to my groin. Sue was still sleepy, but my lips kissing her neck and my hands gently stroking her nipples soon helped her end this selfish sleepiness. “Mmmm … someone’s glad to see me,” she teased, her hand squeezing and stroking my rigid manhood. Guided by Sue’s soft hand, I eased forward and pushed all the way in, eliciting a moan of satisfaction from Sue. I don’t know if it was my imagination, but she did feel a little looser than when we’d made love on Thursday night. Maybe her evening with Francis had done that to her, or maybe it was just my strange imaginings. “Mmmm … you feel good in me, honey,” she cooed at me, still facing away as I slowly stroked in and out. My hips pumping my woman with a pleasing rhythm, I brushed the hair away from her ears and neck and carried on kissing and nibbling to heighten her pleasure. Sue’s moans and sighs were gradually building. “Yes, baby … mmm …. Just there, yes … right there … yes, that’s it …” as my cock touched the right places. Even as we enjoyed myself I couldn’t totally rid myself of thoughts of Francis. How his much bigger cock would always reach places I couldn’t. Stretch Sue like I couldn’t. But I forced these thoughts aside, happy that Sue was obviously enjoying our early morning make-out. I felt my juices rising and decided to slow things down, withdrawing and gently turning Sue by the shoulder so she was now laying on her back in the middle of our bed. She smiled up at me as my eyes looked up and down her body. Marveling at how good she looked for forty-four-years-old. Flat tummy, big soft breasts, and an hour-glass figure to die for. Crowned by a loving smile and an impish sense of fun. Part of me thought I must be mad to share this woman. The other part of me thought sharing her was the only way to keep a woman who was so far out of my league. As I drank in her sexy body, Sue just grinned at me as she enjoyed my lustful inspection of her naked body. Once upon a time, many years ago she might have been shy and would have blushed. But twenty-five years together and the games we’d recently played had blown away any such modesty. She just grinned, slightly pushing her boobs out further and sucking in her tummy a fraction. Enjoying seeing the lust her man still had for her after all these years. “You like?” came Sue’s question, part teasing, and part pride. Now that Sue was lying on her back, I could clearly see all the evidence of her night of passion with Francis. Last night I’d not noticed as we’d been too tied up in the more important matters of trying to fix the mess. But now, as my five-inch cock stood rigidly to attention, I took in every detail. Every little piece of evidence of what Sue and her Nigerian lover had been up to. Her slightly swollen nipples, complete with marks on her breasts from their hours in bed. A few love bites. Sue had yet to shower and so there was still dried semen on her tummy and inner thighs, with some also captured in the matted hair of her landing strip. The lips that guarded the entrance to her body were pushed wide and proud in an exaggerated ‘O’ shape. Reshaped by the fatness of Francis’ big cock and the sheer length of time he’d had his fat cock inside Sue’s body during their date. As Sue caught me looking at her puffy and swollen pussy, her expression suddenly switched from playful pride to nervous concern. “Pete, are you still upset?” I loved this woman. Despite everything, she was still looking out for my feelings. Ever watchful if we pushed it too far. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. “No, honey, I’m okay. It’s just sometimes I wish it was simpler. That I didn’t get off so much on thinking about you and Francis together. It’s like a huge rollercoaster. One minute I’m up, the next minute I’m down. Sometimes I just wish it could be simpler and more normal.” As I caught myself saying this, my mind went back to when Sue had told Jenny that she sometimes wished I was a more normal husband. One with normal fantasies and no desire to share her with other men. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sue and I finished our love-making. It was joyous. A physical pleasure, but more importantly a re-cementing of our love and relationship. Knocking the bricks in place and back square after all the issues from Friday night. Then we settled down to work out what we were going to do. We snuggled in bed as we talked it though, Sue repeating her earlier words that she’d support whatever we decided, but that we couldn’t keep changing our minds. She didn’t say the words, but I knew what she meant. That for me to keep changing my mind wasn’t fair on her or on Francis. As we discussed it all, Sue gently pushed me to think through why I’d been so panic-stricken on Friday night and hadn’t enjoyed it. As we talked and talked I knew it all came down to one thing. Fear of losing Sue. Provided I was secure in her love, the thought of her being with Francis excited me as it always had done. But if I was worried about Sue’s feelings for him being stronger than her feelings for me, then all hell broke loose. With an incredibly erotic experience mutating into a horror movie of gut-wrenching fear and soul-destroying panic. The discussion took most of Saturday and Sunday, with Sue not hiding her own desire to carry on seeing Francis and also spreading her wings to experience new sexual experiences. But she was adamant and clear that she’d only want to do that if I also wanted it. Sue said it wasn’t enough that I just be comfortable and ‘okay’ with this arrangement. She only wanted to do this if I still got excited by the set-up. As I’d been right at the outset when I’d been the one to start it all. Our discussions on Saturday night were interrupted when Sue received a WhatsApp message from Grace. She was through to the next round of being considered for the nursing scholarship here in New York. The emojis made clear how excited Grace was about the news, and she asked Sue to pass on the news to me. I found it interesting that Grace had shared her news with Sue first, rather than me. But I guess in part this made sense as it was Sue and Francis who’d been much more involved than me in her application. According to her message, she’d be arriving in around four weeks time. As Sue and Grace exchanged a couple of messages, Sue offered to put Grace up in our house so that she could save the per diem allowance she’d received for food, travel, and accommodation. It did strike me that Sue made this offer without asking me. But I told myself I was just being picky, knowing I’d have said yes and that one of the things I loved most about Sue was her generosity of spirit. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I think it was around Sunday lunchtime when we reached a decision. We’d carry on including Francis in our marriage. But we agreed on two vitally important things. Firstly, to make sure we communicated openly as a couple. And secondly, to make sure we never let Sue’s time with Francis crowd out the time Sue and I needed together to keep our own relationship healthy. This commitment to open and honest communication received its first test when I pressed Sue to share with me what she’d been discussing on the driveway with Francis. And what it was she’d changed her mind about telling me on the Friday night while she was dressing. Sue paused before answering, searching for the right words, as she nervously chewed her lower lip. “On Friday night what I was going to tell you was that you were being unfair to Francis and me. That you’d agreed for me to stay over, and then changed your mind. And while that’s true, I didn’t tell you because I could see how much you were hurting and couldn’t cope if I’d slept over.” Sue looked into my eyes and waited for my reaction. Chin up, not challenging, but not apologetic either. Just telling me the truth and letting me know how she and Francis felt. “Okay, I guess I can’t complain about that. Thanks, honey, for being so understanding. For understanding how much I was hurting and what my limits were.” Sue squeezed my hand as a sign of a couple united even through difficult issues, and started telling me about her driveway conversation with Francis. “And when we were talking on the driveway, we talked about a number of things.” She suddenly looked nervous and I wondered why. “The first thing I did was apologize to Francis.” Sue held my gaze, seeing if I was going to complain. I didn’t like the thought of Sue apologizing to another guy for my behavior, but for now, I said nothing. “I apologized because he’d been a perfect gentleman. He’d checked with you several times to see if you were okay with him and me making out. But then you changed your mind again, and it didn’t feel fair to him.” As Sue and I looked at each other, I knew this was a two-way street and that I needed to tell her my feelings. “Okay, honey. I can’t say that I’m overjoyed with you apologizing to another guy about my behavior. But I do get it. And for what it’s worth, I’m not going to apologize for feeling the way I felt, because I can’t change my feelings. But I am sorry for putting you and Francis in that position. I know he’s a good guy. And you’re right, he did ask if I was okay. It’s just it all changed for me and got way too much.” Sue’s face told me she accepted my half-apology. “What else? Afterward,” I asked her. “Then we talked some more. About how hard this was for you sometimes. How you wanted it, then you didn’t want it. Francis said he understood how hard it must be, as it would drive him insane if he’d ever had to share Heidi. And then we agreed that he and I would talk about it more after you and I had figured out what it is we want. And that’s pretty much it. The Uber came a few seconds later.” We looked at each other. And a little part of me felt hurt that Sue and Francis had agreed to talk about it in the week. But I told myself not to be stupid. What did I expect? They could hardly just ignore each other and not talk about it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sue and I were both happy at our decision and our two new guidelines about time and communication. We wrapped things up just in time, as looking at my watch I saw we needed to head to the airport to pick up Joseph. His flight was arriving at around one-thirty p.m. and we wanted to make absolutely sure that we were there to greet him. We’d have felt terrible if he’d arrived in the confusing world of New York and there wasn’t a friendly face to greet him. We arrived just in time and Joseph was really pleased to see us. I made the introductions and, maybe not surprisingly, his gaze seemed to linger on Sue just a little longer than was necessary. He was subtle about it, but I’m pretty sure I wasn’t imagining it. A little voice in my brain wondered if he’d been gossiping with Grace, Lisa, and Joel in the hotel, and knew about Sue’s predilections for other men. Especially men of color. The ride home was uneventful, filled with all the normal small talk about flights, families and any special requests for things he wanted to see in New York. Sue and I had planned to give Joseph a home-cooked dinner, but we’d been so pre-occupied with other things that we decided, in the end, to take him out for a meal. Sue was her normal chatty and gregarious self, and Joseph seemed more interested in chatting to Sue than me. I guess I couldn’t blame him, and he didn’t push it too far, but he peppered Sue with loads of questions about her career, family, and life in New York. He said it had always been his ambition to migrate to America one day and that he was looking for any opportunities to work here. It was Sue who discovered that he didn’t have a regular girlfriend at the moment as he’d just split from a longtime partner. At least that’s what he said, but who knows if that was true or if he was just signaling to Sue that he was free and available. But generally, it was all harmless fun, including Joseph and Sue even having a few dances at a bar that he said he’d heard of and that he wanted to visit. It was all proper and appropriate, with no untoward touching or anything like that. But still, seeing and hearing them laughing and dancing certainly set-off something in me as I looked on, stomach churning as normal. On Monday Sue was first out of the house as she headed off to the hospital. Joseph and I left the house around ten minutes after Sue and were soon locked away in a meeting room trying to make progress on the final report. It was a real struggle for me to concentrate as this was the first time Sue had been at the hospital with Francis since I’d returned from Malawi. The whole of the previous week Sue and I had been together, in our little heavenly bubble as we enjoyed our leave together and reconnected as a couple. But now as Joseph and I tried to concentrate on the report, my mind was filled with images of Sue bent over Francis’ desk getting a sound fucking from behind. Or maybe perched on the edge of the desk, legs over his shoulders as his glistening black cock pummeled her depths. I realized I’d made a huge mistake in not setting ground rules or expectation for what I was okay with them doing while they were together at the hospital. Joseph and I had to work late and it was nearly eight thirty when we got home that evening. I was relieved beyond description to see Sue’s car in the drive. When we entered Sue was relaxing in the lounge, a picture of tranquil loveliness. From the look on her face, there was no clue at all as to whether she’d had sex with Francis during the day. I was desperate to get her alone so I could ask her about it. Torn in two as to whether I did or didn’t want something to have happened between them during the day. Sue had prepared a wonderful home cooked meal in honor of Joseph’s stay, and he really enjoyed it but seemed in no hurry to retire to bed. I was like a cat on a hot tin roof waiting for him to go to bed so I could quiz Sue about her day. But try as I might Joseph wouldn’t take a hint. So I finally deployed an over-acted yawn and declared that I was heading to bed. I could have swung for the young Ghanaian. Not only did he not take the hint, but with me now safely out of the way, he proceeded to spend the next hour chatting to Sue. As I eavesdropped on their conversation it was pretty clear that he was flirting with Sue, which made me suspicious that he had indeed discovered the secret of the bedroom games we played. As I listened to Joseph flirting with Sue I felt all mixed up inside. I couldn’t deny it was turning me on. But I was also incredibly frustrated as it delayed me finding out about what had happened between Sue and Francis at the hospital. Sue finally came upstairs and the instant I saw her expression I knew she’d been playing me. “Did you enjoy listening in, honey? He’s quite the flirt, isn’t he? Young Joseph. Quite the ladies’ man, and handsome to boot.” Busted! My face flushed as Sue just grinned at me. Sue came up to me and wrapped her arms around me. “Anyway, honey. He’s way too young for me. No need for you to worry, I’m not into cradle-snatching just yet.” Looking deep into my eyes she smiled seductively and then kissed me softly. After so many years together, couples develop a sixth sense and so Sue’s next words maybe shouldn’t have come as any great surprise. “And, darling, to answer your unasked question, no.” She was really going for it. Teasing me. Forcing me to clarify and dig into her half statement. As we held each other close, I gave in. “Okay, you win. What are you telling me? That you didn’t get together with Francis today?” “Why? Would you prefer if I had?” she teased again, lips curled playfully as she pressed my buttons before finally relenting. “To put you out of your misery, no. No, we didn’t do anything today at the hospital.” Her arms still around my neck as I held her hips, Sue’s expression changed from playful to serious. “Honey, after what happened on Friday night, I wasn’t about to do anything with Francis without running it by you first.” This was exactly what I needed to hear. The inner pervert was disappointed, but the real me was overjoyed to hear Sue’s words. They smacked of us restoring some balance and order to our marriage. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tuesday and Wednesday nights followed a similar pattern, including young Joseph flirting with Sue. I’m not quite sure how it came up, but on Wednesday night Joseph let the cat out of the bag that he did indeed know about the games that Sue and I played in the bedroom. I think we were on our second bottle of wine and Joseph made some throwaway comment about how pretty the women were in New York. As he said this he was looking at Sue, and we all burst out laughing. Sue downplayed it with a self-deprecating comment. “You’ve got to be kidding. Maybe in my youth, but I can’t hold a candle to some of these young hotties these days.” Joseph smiled with a wicked glint. “Nonsense. I have it on good authority that for you and Pete, there’s many a good tune played on an old fiddle. A fiddle that likes real soul. At least that’s what Joel told me!” Sue blushed and I wondered if Joseph was going to regret his comment. But once she’d recovered from the shock she actually smiled at the comment, although still blushing. “Well, I guess I shouldn’t be totally surprised. After all, I’m sure what my hubby and Grace were getting up to was pretty common knowledge. So I shouldn’t be surprised if other secrets ended up being not so secret.” The conversation continued with quite some innuendo and suggestion until Sue gently closed it down, telling Joseph she thought he was a handsome young man but she wasn’t in the market for another lover. Especially one who was only a couple of years older than her own son. She let him down with a light and humorous touch, and Joseph took no offense. As Joseph would be flying out first thing Saturday morning, Thursday night we had to put in a really long shift at the office. By seven thirty I knew there was no way we’d be home much before midnight and so I texted Sue and apologized. I was just getting started on the next part of the report when Sue texted her reply:
‘Oh dear. But on the positive side, would you be okay if I invited Francis over to keep me company? It would be nice, but understand if not ok with you. Although it would be kind of kinky hot if he’s still here when you and Joseph come home.’ She knew exactly how to press every one of my pervert buttons. The mental picture of Sue and Francis greeting us naked under their bathrobes as we got home was a difficult one to push from my mind. Joseph already knew about our games, but such a scene was kinky beyond belief. I just stared and stared at the words of Sue’s text. So wicked. As her words ate into my brain, I knew I’d say yes. But still, it took some time before I finally replied:
‘Mrs. Susan Jones. You’re something else. Where did this streak come from? You’re driving your poor husband crazy. To answer your question, yes. Why not ask the good doctor over for a house visit?’ Sue’s reply was a single smiley face. Nothing else was needed. The rest of the evening I was a total mess and only about ten percent productive. Try as I might, my mind kept wandering over to Scarsdale and what would be happening there between Sue and Francis. I pictured them making out in each and every corner of the house. Images of Sue’s soft pink body squashed beneath Francis muscular black frame filled my head. Mental pictures of my beautiful Sue sitting atop Francis. Riding him like a prize stallion, hips slammed down to get him as deep as possible, making up for lost time. Kneeling between his thick black legs and worshipping his big black cock. Coaxing it back to life for a final session before Joseph and I were expected home. I don’t know if Joseph picked up on my distraction. He’d have had to be blind not to. Several times when I was talking I lost my train of thought, sidelined by images of Sue and Francis making passionate love as I worked deep into the evening. I felt like I was sweating and shaking as I tried my best to concentrate on the work in hand. I must have made quite a sight to Joseph. But on the positive side, I realized that the waves of panic and terror which had tormented me during Sue and Francis’ Friday date were absent. Sure, my gut was plagued by nervous cramps. And I had to close my eyes to calm myself more times that I can remember. But this was more like things had been before. I realized that all of the talking Sue and I had done at the weekend had gone a huge way to calming my terrors of losing her to Francis. And the fact she’d not done anything with Francis at the hospital told me this thing wasn’t totally out of control. That we’d restored some balance and control. This realization cheered me up immensely as we drove back home. As we drove back I toyed with warning Joseph of what awaited him back in Scarsdale. But bearing in mind how much he’d been flirting with Sue, I decided to wreak a little revenge. To see how well he coped with the shock. As I turned the corner into our road my heart jumped into my mouth as I saw Francis’ car parked big and bold in our drive. The symbolism of his large black Escalade parked next to and totally overwhelming Sue’s much smaller mid-size stuck in my throat. As we parked up Joseph looked at me with a questioning expression, and I wondered whether to put him out of his misery. With a confidence and a calm that surprised me, I spoke. “Oh that. If you’re wondering Joseph, that’s Sue’s boyfriend’s car. She was bored as we were taking so long. So I said it would be fine for him to pop around to keep Sue company.” As far as is possible for a Ghanaian, all the color drained from poor Joseph’s face as my verbal stiletto sank home. But give him his due, the young man was a cool customer and he soon recovered his poise. With a broad grin having replaced his shock, he spoke. “Lucky old Francis. To be with such a beautiful white woman as your Sue. I guess I should have worked harder at school. After all, if I’d have known that’s what doctors get for fringe benefits, I’d have worked my butt off.” Joseph’s smooth recovery and response made me smile, and I felt like we were partners in crime as we entered the house. The Lone Ranger and Tonto, or maybe Batman and Robin. As I shut the door, I didn’t see anyone in the lounge and so I called out. “We’re home. Anyone at home.” There was no shame or embarrassment in Sue’s voice as she called down. “We’re up here, hun. We’ll be down in a minute.” I felt an exquisite bittersweet anticipation at the embarrassment that I knew was only moments away. It hadn’t arrived yet, but I could feel myself start to cringe at the upcoming humiliation and awkwardness I was about to endure. As I poured Joseph a drink and tried to control my blushing, I heard Sue’s light steps on the stairs. Followed by Francis’ much heavier footfall just behind her. Sue was dressed in her favorite white toweling bathrobe, with Francis dressed in his daytime suit. The only hint in his dress as to what they’d been doing being a tie which was draped loosely around his neck and the top three or four buttons of his shirt undone. Sue padded over to me and gave me a welcome home kiss. Her lips and cheeks smelt of Francis and his cologne. “There you are, honey. We thought you were never coming home.” Her use of the word ‘we’ felt like a paper cut to my feelings, but I let it pass and strangely enjoyed it. This whole four-person scene was some really weird shit. Sue curled herself around me as she did the introductions, unable to resist a little game playing. “Joseph, this is Francis. And I don’t think I need to explain what Francis is to me and Pete.” An arched eyebrow making clear her meaning. Joseph just grinned and offered his hand. “Nice to meet you. Francis. You’re a helluva a lucky guy.” For a moment I thought Francis might be on the point of punching the cheeky youngster. Just for a moment, a dark shadow came across his face. But just as quickly as it had arrived it left and Francis recovered his customary poise. “Well, I guess I can’t argue with that. The rewards of age and wisdom,” he added in the gentlest of putdowns to the younger man. They were like two stags clashing horns over the same female, Sue’s little grin telling me she was enjoying being the prize. All four of us chatted for a few minutes before Francis headed out. As Sue showed him to the door, they shared a deep and passionate kiss, with their eyes lingering as they finally broke for air. Not even the slightest embarrassment at kissing in front of our guest. As Sue closed the door and turned to face Joseph, he was the one blushing, not Sue. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Friday night followed a similar pattern. Only as this was our last night working together, we worked even later and it was gone one when my car finally pulled into our drive. I’d received the expected text from Sue earlier seeking my permission for Francis to come round, but given the late hour, I wondered if he’d have already left. But his big black Cadillac was still parked next to Sue’s mid-size as we finally pulled in. I guess I could hardly blame him for making the most of his time with Sue, knowing that he’d not see her over the weekend. Sue and I dropped Joseph off at JFK on Saturday morning, with the young Ghanaian giving Sue a hug which was just a little too tight and a little too long to be appropriate. That was as close as he was going to get to any physical intimacy with Sue so I let it pass. Sue and I spent the rest of the weekend doing as little as possible. The week just ended had been such a busy one when we’d not enjoyed as much time together as we wanted. So we deliberately put everything that we could on hold and just pampered ourselves. On a whim, I booked us into our favorite little hotel in New Haven, Connecticut and we enjoyed a romantic Saturday night and Sunday. We briefly talked about the week just gone and about the two evenings Sue had spent with Francis. But I was feeling a lot more comfortable and secure about everything so we didn’t need to spend much time talking about it. Sue and I were both happier to focus on each other as we enjoyed the old world ambiance and charm of the hotel, remembering back to times we’d come as a couple or with Donovan. The next three weeks were pretty uneventful. Joseph was gone and so Sue and I had our home and our evenings back for ourselves. On the Thursday of the first week just as I was leaving work I got a text from Sue asking if I was okay if she saw Francis that evening, making sure to emphasize that if I was okay with it she’d see me later that evening. I thought about it for just a few moments. My earlier soul-destroying panic was no longer there, and the thought of them being together excited me. All those weeks back when I was in Malawi I’d given Sue my permission to date who she wanted. The only thing that rankled a little was that I’d not get to see them in action together. I’d have to make do with the edited highlights later when Sue returned. So I killed two birds with one stone. Texting back to Sue that I was okay for her to spend time with Francis that evening, adding that on Friday night if Francis we free she should invite him around to our place. This Thursday / Friday night double-header set the pattern for the next weeks. I think Sue and Francis were happy to have their Thursday nights together, and the Friday nights at our place seemed to work well for everyone. I developed a habit of declaring my tiredness after dinner and a couple of drinks and heading off to bed. I’m sure Sue and Francis knew that I was discretely watching them as they made out downstairs before I’d scamper back to our bedroom as they headed upstairs into the guest room. They were good enough to leave the door slightly ajar so I was able to watch their love-making before Sue would sneak back into bed with me in the small hours. I guessed that Sue would have preferred to spend the night cuddling with Francis, but I appreciated she was trying to avoid doing anything that might stoke my fears and insecurities. This whole new pattern to our married life and relationship felt good. The key word was balance. Sue and I had plenty of time together. And not just dog-ends of time. Quality time. Which meant when she was with Francis I had a deep foundation of her love and reassurance to fall back on, enabling me to enjoy my kinky little pleasure. Savoring it with just the right amount of jealousy and nervousness stirred in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The only interruption to this pattern came on the weekend of the 9th and 10th December, when Grace’s much heralded two-week interview and acclimatization trip to New York finally arrived. Just like we’d done with Joseph, we picked up her up from the airport late on Sunday. Her trip had been much longer than Joseph’s, and so she was pretty much done in and just wanted to head straight to bed when we got back to our home. Monday was a recovery day for her as she didn’t need to go to the hospital until Tuesday and so as Sue and I headed to work we showed her where everything was and left her to her own devices. I was just tidying up at work and looking forward to spending the evening with my two women when I got an incoming text:
‘Hey Pete, are you free for a quick chat at my place on your way home? I have a proposition I’d like to discuss with you.’ No prizes for guessing the sender. The last few weeks had been so good that inevitably I felt my stomach start to knot as the adrenaline kicked in. What did Francis want? And why did he want to discuss it just the two of us? Mano-a-mano.
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<a href="//vermect.ru/stories/wife-lovers/-feeding-an-addiction-part-2-ch-3-.aspx"> Feeding an addiction Part 2: Ch 3 </a>